With a newborn baby in the house, sleep is at a premium. So while I’ve actually written three posts since Monday, I haven’t published one of them.

Why?

Because I couldn’t deliver anything that stood a chance of at least meeting your expectations. So I chose not to post anything.

And that felt great.

I realize that everything we deliver won’t be a hit. But when we finish a project on time and it isn’t good enough yet, we have a choice to make:

1. Disappoint your customer, or
2. Push back the delivery date.

The next time you have something that isn’t good enough (yet), remember that one choice feels a lot better than the other.

I don’t want to be surprised when my dentist uses his electric drill. I don’t want to be surprised when I pick up my car from the service department. And I sure don’t want to be surprised when I bite into my deli sandwich.

But if you want me to help spread your story, then you’d better do something that hasn’t been done before. Sure, this feels risky at first – but I guaranty that if you always play it safe, you’ll never surprise anyone.

There’s a better way. And it can lead to growth that is more sustainable, predictable and profitable than ever before.

Do things FOR people instead.  Don’t push, lead. This takes a lot of effort, but it works – just ask Gary Vaynerchuk.

Every day, more than 80,000 people visit Vaynerchuk’s Wine Library TV to learn about wine. There they can watch videos (for free) about everything from decanting to training their palate. The site is an incredible act of generosity that has fueled a movement.

And even though he has more than a million connections across social networks, Gary V still encourages people to email him directly with questions. While I can’t get a return phone call from my CPA, Vaynerchuk responds to everyone.

This approach is brilliant.

Why market to an audience when you can lead them instead?

Yet often the first marketing act by new business owners is to put up a sign like this one.

Why?

If I liked the business before you got there, now I’m worried that it won’t be nearly as good.

If I didn’t like it, a sign announcing your arrival won’t encourage me to try again. I’ve already moved on, remember?

Here’s a better idea: forget the sign. Tell me a new story instead.

Now, imagine that one day the moon decides to expand its reach. Rather than focus on dominating a natural niche (the nighttime sky), it moves into the sun’s market.

What should the sun do?

Actually, nothing. And that’s the point.

You can’t lose to competitors that don’t exist.

There are niches everywhere, and new ones show up every day. If you haven’t found one yet, don’t worry.

Your opportunity is coming.

Every company has one. The problem: some can’t resist the temptation to tell stories that don’t match reality. In other words, they lie to customers.

To prove this point, let’s take a look at the stories told by Apple and Pets.com. One story is true, the other is a lie. Not surprisingly, one company has flourished, and the other is out of business.

Pets.com: Pets Can’t Drive campaign (1999 – 2000)

The Story: pet food, supplies and toys for consumers focused on price and convenience.

Truth or Lie? Lie. While Pets.com initially delivered on price, this wasn’t sustainable (the company lost money on most items sold because they undercharged shipping costs to attract customers). But the real lie was about convenience. When customers placed an order, they had to wait several days to receive the items. And when you need kitty litter, you need it now. Trust me on this one.

Apple: Think Different campaign (1997 – 2002)

The Story: people with passion can change the world for the better.

Truth or Lie? Truth. The story asserted that Apple nurtured creativity by behaving as unconventionally as the accomplished thinkers and doers who were praised as “the round pegs in the square holes.” The company lived this story in every way: it’s packaging, product design, online computer store, and retail outlets. The campaign didn’t work because it was creative; it worked because Apple was fully dedicated to the story it told.

The challenge you face is clear: you need to tell a story. To make it authentic, you need to live and breathe this story every day, from how you answer the phone to the way you deliver your product.

Start by asking yourself two questions:

1. What is my company’s story?
2. Is it true?

I never believe: what you tell me.

I sometimes believe: what you show me.

I always believe: what I tell myself.

It’s my perspective that counts, not yours. If you want to change my mind, don’t talk to me about features and benefits – it’s not effective (personally, I get defensive or annoyed).

Want to change my mind? Persuade me to do something?

Make an emotional connection instead. If you take any other approach, I’m gone. Right along with your hopes of a sale.

I’ve really had it with your approach.

I don’t know you. You don’t know me. Which means that you haven’t earned the right to reach out to me directly.

I’ve repeatedly asked you to stop, but you refuse. In fact, attempts to contact me have increased in frequency. Today one of your people called me ten times in five minutes!

As such, I regret to inform you that I plan to launch a crusade against all forms of SPAM. More to follow on this soon.

Remember, just because everyone won’t complain about your methods doesn’t mean you have permission to use them with me (or anyone else).

Still, there was one moment of slight discomfort at dinner (Mom, read the entire post before you pick up the phone) – sharing what we were thankful for in our lives. My list was usually unoriginal. I was thankful for my health, my family, and parents who were forgiving and patient with me (I didn’t make that easy). I was desperate for material. Why? I had it good, didn’t realize it, and sounded insincere as a result.

I may have been bad, but when it comes to thanking customers, companies are much worse. Terrible, actually. Need examples of corporate insincerity? How about a holiday newsletter that talks about…the company. Or generic, bulk email sent with Constant Contact. The list goes on and on.

How do you show customer appreciation?

If your efforts might be seen as insincere, stop what you’re doing. The core objective is to tell your customers how much you care about and appreciate them – if you can’t do that, don’t bother.

To help point you in the right direction, take a tip from GoDaddy.

GoDaddy is my hosting provider. I’ve been with them for a year, and never had the need to interact with them. So when they called the other day, I assumed that they wanted to sell me something. I was wrong.

GoDaddy: Ed, this is Jeffrey from GoDaddy. This is just a courtesy call – I wanted to see how things are going with your account and answer any questions you might have. Do you have a few minutes to talk?

Courtesy call? Right. He wants to pitch me on something. OK, I’ll bite and see where it goes.

Me: Sure. Go ahead.

GoDaddy: Great. I noticed that you have several hosting accounts. Are some of these client sites, or does each one belong to you?

I explained that they were my sites, and gave him a brief overview of my goals with each one.

GoDaddy: Those sound like interesting projects (his tone was genuine). You know, since you own each website, there is a way to save money on your hosting.

Here it comes: the sales pitch.

GoDaddy: What you can do is consolidate these websites under one account.

Huh? That would save me money.

Me: Really? I thought that each site required its own hosting account.

GoDaddy: Not necessarily. If your site uses an SSL certificate, then that’s true. Otherwise, you can choose a site as the primary domain, then add secondary domains to that account. You’ll be fine as long as you stay within the space limitations of your hosting plan.

I’ll send you a link to our Help Center – you can find answers to questions about the process there. And if you get stuck, call us.

I couldn’t believe it.

Me: Thanks for this information. You just reduced my hosting costs by 50%!

GoDaddy: I’m glad we could help. Is everything else with your service OK? Do you have questions I might be able answer?

Me: No, not right now.

GoDaddy: Well, we really appreciate your business. If there is anything we can do for you in the future, please let us know. Have a great holiday!

I read a lot of blogger debates about the right way to thank customers. Phone vs. email, gifts vs. cards. These are the wrong arguments.

The tools don’t matter. Caring does.

Your objective: thank customers in a way that shows you really care. Do it like GoDaddy, and your customers might just thank you instead.

No one cares about a blog if someone isn’t blogging. I haven’t done that in quite a while, which has turned this site into an inanimate object (for now).

It’s no different with anything else. Do you care about fish? Paint? Bicycles?

I’m fairly certain that my friend Mike doesn’t care about fish, but he loves fishing. Just like others have a passion for painting or bicycling.

My challenge – and yours – is to clean up grammar. To change what we do from a noun to a verb.

Do that, and people will care.